@mikesusz social feed.

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mike susz

@mikesusz

me shopping for a phone case

* nope, doesn’t need a hole to see the apple logo
* nope, doesn’t need your giant logo of random company
* nope, that one looks like it will actually harm my phone
* nope, that looks like a robot ate my phone

· view on Twitter

mike susz

@mikesusz

depression fam: does your brain ever conflate self-care with selfishness? like whatever time and attention you need to take in order to address (being basically a filth-producing animal) is indulgent?

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mike susz

@mikesusz

yet another holiday weekend i’ve chosen to ruin myself with work outside. i’d probably feel better if our house looked great. but this is all work to keep it from looking bad.

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mike susz

@mikesusz

yesterday i did too many of the things, which means today i was inclined to avoid any small number of the things. eventually i may learn to temper my weekend activities to average out and be less ruinous.

· view on Twitter

mike susz

@mikesusz

don’t be that guy:
* at Home Depot
* no mask
* talking loudly
* “the data is wrong”
* “the disease isn’t that bad”
* “this is all stupid”

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mike susz

@mikesusz

sometimes i look at my followers list and i think “who unfollowed me?” then i remember i blocked that account whose profile photo was a picture of a butt

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mike susz

@mikesusz

anyone else realize they're part of like 7 or 8 discords but only have the time and attention span for like one channel on one discord?

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mike susz

@mikesusz

my wife: “I tapped on an egg to hatch it, and the app crashed.”

me: “oh! you hatched a bug-type!”

her:

me: (laughing uncontrollably)

her: ಠ_ಠ

#PokemonGo

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mike susz

@mikesusz

website: “we use cookies, CONSENT TO COOKIES”

website also: “tell us your zip code every time you visit forever”

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mike susz

@mikesusz

now that celebrities have taught us all how to wash our hands properly, can they start talking about the importance of wearing a mask in public?

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mike susz

@mikesusz

Hello, Hulu, Netflix, Amazon Prime, CBS, AppleTV+, and HBO? yes i’d like to cancel my service. reason for cancellation? oh, i guess i just don’t use it much anymore.

by the way, have you played Animal Crossing?

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mike susz

@mikesusz

it’s difficult to not just wake up, come downstairs, pour coffee, start working. this morning i’m trying to stay away from my computer until 8.

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mike susz

@mikesusz

kids left a bunch of crap around outside their houses so my wife took it and disbursed it around the island. scavenger hunt in #AnimalCrossing !

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mike susz

@mikesusz

today my wife said “we don’t have enough momentous occasions” and summarily opened a 22oz of @StoneBrewing Double Bastard from … 2008. ooof. it is delicious. i am sleepy.

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mike susz

@mikesusz

my boys are getting old enough that i need to have a talk with them.

if she don't want your number
no, she ain't gonna give you hers
no, she don't wanna meet you nowhere
no, she don't want none of your time

she don't want no scrub
a scrub is a guy that can't get no love from

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