A searchable archive of 15,555 posts across 3 platforms.
15555 results
šdidšyoušupdatešthešstoryšinšJira?š
Jan 24, 2019, 3:13 PM UTC · view on Twitter
Favs: 13 Reposts: 1
me? i'm okay. definitely not openly weeping in the office. this is beautiful.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=msgimk3mV6g Jan 22, 2019, 8:21 PM UTC · view on Twitter
Apple Watch question: does snow removal count as an āHigh-Intensity Interval Trainingā or āCross Trainingā
Jan 20, 2019, 8:51 PM UTC · view on Twitter
not to make light of dangerous weather, but remember as you buy emergency provisions, that you will need mixers and limes too.
Jan 19, 2019, 1:02 AM UTC · view on Twitter
Favs: 7 Reposts: 3
Jan 8, 2019, 4:26 PM UTC · view on Twitter
Favs: 1
Jan 7, 2019, 8:08 PM UTC · view on Twitter
Favs: 1
Hey Siri, remind me every four weeks that I own an Apple Pencil.
Jan 7, 2019, 8:01 PM UTC · view on Twitter
Favs: 2
@notasausage hah, also, happy birthday, sir. :)
Jan 5, 2019, 2:31 AM UTC · view on Twitter
Jan 4, 2019, 12:52 AM UTC · view on Twitter
Jan 3, 2019, 6:44 PM UTC · view on Twitter
Jan 2, 2019, 7:07 PM UTC · view on Twitter
Jan 2, 2019, 6:39 PM UTC · view on Twitter
Favs: 1
Jan 2, 2019, 4:22 PM UTC · view on Twitter
where does a Sith buy their robes? at the Darth Mall wait, where are you going ā i have more jokes
Jan 2, 2019, 1:06 AM UTC · view on Twitter
Favs: 5
also time to start saying āfirst time doing _______ since last year!ā or ā i havenāt done _______ since last yearā
Jan 1, 2019, 1:56 PM UTC · view on Twitter
time to start doing goofy things and claim itās part of a resolution
Jan 1, 2019, 1:49 PM UTC · view on Twitter
watching some new yearās eve program and jenny mccarthy is on it. i feel sick. i wish there was some immunization that would have prevented this.
Jan 1, 2019, 2:44 AM UTC · view on Twitter
Favs: 2
happy leftover-from-july-4th fireworks day!
Dec 31, 2018, 10:46 PM UTC · view on Twitter
Favs: 2
my gift to myself at the end of 2018: deleting 700+ items from my Pocket list. Happy New Year.
Dec 31, 2018, 4:31 PM UTC · view on Twitter
Favs: 2
lactose-challenged friends (@jlengstorf @ashleymcnamara ? et al) find this stuff, itās amazing.
https://greenvalleylactosefree.com/ Dec 31, 2018, 3:29 PM UTC · view on Twitter
Favs: 2
ah, yes. Maslowās Four Quadrants of human need.
Dec 30, 2018, 6:17 PM UTC · view on Twitter
Favs: 2
2018 was pretty challenging for me but iām a middle-aged white guy so who cares?
Dec 29, 2018, 2:54 AM UTC · view on Twitter
Favs: 2
every time my kids get frustrated that theyāre not good at something, i remind them that theyāre able to pee on parts of the toilet i didnāt even think it was possible to pee on. keep trying!
Dec 28, 2018, 4:03 PM UTC · view on Twitter
Favs: 2 Reposts: 1
cāmon i have to go to bed
Dec 27, 2018, 4:35 AM UTC · view on Twitter
Favs: 1
srsly i guess iām sleeping in a recliner tonight.
Dec 27, 2018, 4:22 AM UTC · view on Twitter
the siamese is glad weāre home
too
Dec 27, 2018, 4:21 AM UTC · view on Twitter
Favs: 1
welp now theyāre conspiring.
Dec 27, 2018, 3:58 AM UTC · view on Twitter
my kitten is glad to be home.
Dec 27, 2018, 3:20 AM UTC · view on Twitter
Favs: 1
4 day trip to visit family contains two whole days of traveling. forgive me if iām exhausted and we donāt visit too often.
Dec 27, 2018, 1:41 AM UTC · view on Twitter
do you think the contrast is okay?
what contrast?
Dec 25, 2018, 3:27 PM UTC · view on Twitter
Favs: 1
oh good, itās not like you can just find these things laying around
Dec 24, 2018, 3:16 PM UTC · view on Twitter
Favs: 5 Reposts: 1
Dec 22, 2018, 2:39 PM UTC · view on Twitter
Favs: 2
hey, be kind. itās not the shortest day of the year, itās the smallest stature day of the year.
Dec 21, 2018, 11:48 PM UTC · view on Twitter
Favs: 3
Hey Siri, does poetry have to rhyme? ... * smoke appears above datacenter *
Dec 20, 2018, 8:09 PM UTC · view on Twitter
Favs: 2
if ocean currents swirl around like a clothes dryer, we could probably gather up all the plastic bits by throwing a couple fitted sheets out there
Dec 19, 2018, 5:14 PM UTC · view on Twitter
Favs: 4
hooray, i finally screwed this job up completely
Dec 19, 2018, 1:26 AM UTC · view on Twitter
old apple tv + HDMI monitor = treadmill tv
Dec 16, 2018, 6:44 PM UTC · view on Twitter
Favs: 2
Dec 16, 2018, 3:09 AM UTC · view on Twitter
Favs: 2
ten years ago, we had just gotten our power back after 4-1/2 days.
Dec 15, 2018, 10:08 PM UTC · view on Twitter
@ericfisher update: the leaves are back.
Dec 15, 2018, 4:06 PM UTC · view on Twitter
Favs: 2 Reposts: 1
Remember, a journey of a thousand miles starts with waking up. And When I wake up, well I know I'm gonna be, I'm gonna be the man who wakes up next you. When I go out, yeah I know I'm gonna be I'm gonna be the man who goes along with you. If I get drunk, well I know I'm gonna be
Dec 13, 2018, 8:53 PM UTC · view on Twitter
Domo is now employed to keep my cables from slipping through my desk when disconnected
Dec 12, 2018, 4:23 PM UTC · view on Twitter
Favs: 3
update: three years later i have nearly 1200 hours into fallout 4.
https://twitter.com/mikesusz/status/940014950130515968?s=21 Dec 11, 2018, 12:18 AM UTC · view on Twitter
Dec 9, 2018, 3:21 PM UTC · view on Twitter
in a box in the basement i found the last remnants of my Swatch collection from the late 80s.
Dec 9, 2018, 1:23 AM UTC · view on Twitter
Favs: 5
shout out to anyone that remembers Kai's Power Tools
Dec 6, 2018, 7:52 PM UTC · view on Twitter
Favs: 1
i have no idea where this came from. time to have a ātalkā with the boys.
Dec 2, 2018, 3:20 PM UTC · view on Twitter
Favs: 2
do you ever think about how when you're opening a beverage can you are literally tearing metal apart?
Nov 29, 2018, 7:40 PM UTC · view on Twitter
Favs: 1
Iām so tired and itās only Wednesday.
Nov 29, 2018, 3:36 AM UTC · view on Twitter
Favs: 1
Nov 29, 2018, 3:30 AM UTC · view on Twitter
Favs: 3