@mikesusz social feed.

pro tips if you have to take a 'profile' photo for work.

1. set up your phone on a tripod or prop it up, higher than your eye line (nobody likes being photographed from low angles)
2. use the timelapse function of your camera to capture a series of frames
3. stand and mug for a while. to get a natural smile, consider how absurd all of this is
4. replay the video frame x frame until you can find one that you might tolerate
5. (optional) give up, throw your phone & computer into the nearest river

@coburnicus @jayroh @briandigital hey guys, let's have a think about this and we’ll solution it together.

@fred destiny.

@fred i love party parrots. i do not want to see a blinking red light in my peripheral vision all day.

so i had tooted another complaint about Apple TV+ content being egregiously dark, but i deleted it. i found settings in my TV (Sony X800H 65” yeah it’s mid, w/e) to compensate for low contrast and black levels, and i can actually SEE what’s happening now.

my best guess is that Apple assumes you have an OLED and you’re watching in a completely dark theatre or something.

If people you work with completely refuse to stop using the “alarm” emoji - you may need to go scorched-earth.

writing a blog post for the first time in a year. i finally figured out how to synthesize a lot of things i’ve been thinking about. maybe because i just got done with an assignment at work? my brain is free to do ‘other stuff’ than panic about meeting unrealistic deadlines.

@snugug crunch with zero fat

@jayroh oy this is such a pet peeve of mine. just once i wish an engineer would say “should we make sure that people can still give us money even if they block our creepy tracking bits?”

@jerzone that 2nd pic looks like an Escher drawing. wild.

@danyork this is so cool. i’m from Polish descent and i don’t know if i’ll get there. enjoy your trip!

@revmem i’m grilling in a raincoat but not complaining.

@drdrang i have 400%’d my move goal and i wish it would have said “stop. stop doing things.”

if Marshall Mathers was your number one adversary would they be your Eminemesis

okay okay i get it, no politics in your documentation. maybe instead of gender specific pronouns we just use some _hypothetical_ names like “Adolf and Eva”

Hence Aborting!

@markllobrera mammatus clouds! https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mammatus_cloud

@jerzone wow cool! i’ve had this video saved on youtube since my kids were small. we used to watch it just about daily. https://youtu.be/ACkmg3Y64_s

@m750 oh no! dang

@marcamos that’s a lot of HP, i’d hate to meet Poop Senior.

@m750 @jerzone i remember the after-school specials about this in the 80s

@jerzone @m750 nope, our stories are funnier.

@jerzone the frog did it?

Slack would probably get 20x more conversions if instead of threatening to delete the old data in your free account, they threatened to use it to train AI.

@m750 very cool. i’ve been wanting to drive electric, im guessing the torque at launch is ridiculous.

@marcamos they need that dad revenue

marketing products or services to guys with kids should be known as dadvertising.

@esinclai @hotdogsladies or the official logo store. (source: i work for IBM) https://logostore-globalid.us/category/ibmrebus

@jerzone @m750 extinguisher nearby. heat will ignite everything you just sprayed all over it 😂

@jerzone i would soak it in PB blaster then either back into or pull against something really solid

to make it fair for everyone i propose we change Father’s day to “take a nap day”

unanticipated boot failure.

@hotdogsladies big Governor energy

@jerzone they did that with mine and i cut off an old piece of conduit and put it inside the tube of the bird feeder. works the same, not enough room for squirrel to get in there

@m750 yeah i can’t remember when i got this leverlock. the small ones - i’ve been buying one every time i go to homedepot. trying to saturate the house with them (so my good measure doesn’t go missing). i think i need one or two more.

don’t talk to me or my son ever again.

@fred the taco bell part went away so both halves are KFC now. and then they stopped selling wedges. dead to me.

@fred they’re kind of all the same one. “i’m at the KFC!” “i’m at the KFC!” “i’m at the combination KFC and KFC!”

@threetonesun it used to be a combo KFC/Taco Bell. but yes, what you said is still true.

looking forward to improvements in Siri at WWDC this year.

@hotdogsladies two amazing heads of hair, there

@andybaio i didn’t have “waxy.org smell tour of St. Louis” on my 2024 bingo card!

@jayroh i haven’t had my hair cut in 20+ years i am stuck in bleak winter forever

i should not try watching AppleTV+ programming during the day.

@marcoarment @caseyliss does it still disconnect if you use a cable to tether LIKE AN ANIMAL?

@Sauce_ grape jelly packet top left = ssd?

@foone can get a basket designed to wash baby bottle parts in the full-size dishwasher.

my oldest son, who just turned 15, read Neuromancer for the first time. i can’t imagine being exposed to this at that age.

i’ve read the book probably 8 or 9 times, but the first time i was in my late 20s.

i’m asking him to read Snow Crash next.

today was a weird mastodon day for me. @annika (who i met at javascript conferences in boston) replied to a thread with @andybaio (who i met at webvisions in portland in 2008) talking about a compilation album curated by @Cameo who is a dear friend i have not seen in far too many years.

i like mastodon. i love you all.

@jerzone broooonco