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mike susz

@mikesusz

for lunch I am going to go out to my car and sob quietly.

hold my calls.

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mike susz

@mikesusz

sometimes you shave the yak, sometimes, the yak shaves you.

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mike susz

@mikesusz

I absolutely cannot understand the people who stay in a lane that is backed up from an exit, if they are not exiting.

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mike susz

@mikesusz

when that pharma ad comes on TV and says “… major bleeding …”

and i reflexively salute.

Major Bleeding! #HIMYM

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mike susz

@mikesusz

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mike susz

@mikesusz

judging by past sponsorships of The Walking Dead, i expect the group to find Bob Odenkirk driving a new Hyundai holding a Microsoft Surface

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mike susz

@mikesusz

“feature Y tested the best when we put feature Y at the top of the homepage.” yes, but then how did feature X test?

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mike susz

@mikesusz

remember to trust your data! except when it’s flawed.

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mike susz

@mikesusz

how can Bowser afford so many castles and henchmen? is he some sort of hip-hop magnate?

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mike susz

@mikesusz

i’m so surprised that we drink so much more coffee nowadays when apps used to take so much longer to launch

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mike susz

@mikesusz

the whoosh of steam when the coffee pot is done is one of the most beautiful sounds. it might win out over out the laughter of children.

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mike susz

@mikesusz

lol.

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mike susz

@mikesusz

“Leave Packaging Feedback” well okay.

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mike susz

@mikesusz

eat something before you take a nap. a nappetizer.

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mike susz

@mikesusz

saturday night! you know what that means. reading the manpage for lsof. as you do.

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mike susz

@mikesusz

ate an almond and felt guilty. yep this is a thing now.

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mike susz

@mikesusz

the world's smallest and most wooden Apple Store just opened in my living room.

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mike susz

@mikesusz

you can manage notifications from individual kickstarter projects on your notifications page: https://www.kickstarter.com/settings/notifications

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mike susz

@mikesusz

so i backed a popular kickstarter almost two years ago. in the past ten days they’ve published six updates promoting other projects.

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mike susz

@mikesusz

emails from Wordpress about a new comment are a great reminder that you haven’t entered your akismet key

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mike susz

@mikesusz

is it possible to get an hexagonal graph paper moleskine

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mike susz

@mikesusz

i literally cannot wait to watch videos of privileged kids whining that their parents got them the wrong Watch.

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mike susz

@mikesusz

can anyone point me to the legal precedent of requiring me to enter my age before viewing a website about alcohol?

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mike susz

@mikesusz

datavis, kindergarten style

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mike susz

@mikesusz

I just listened to two middle-aged white guy technology professionals blather on and on about how the new MacBook does not fit their needs.

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mike susz

@mikesusz

pro tip: if you’re going to funnel all your links through a click tracking server, make darn-well sure that server is 100% available.

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mike susz

@mikesusz

sometimes when we watch Cutthroat Kitchen, not only do i not want any of these people to win, i want them all to contract some icky disease.

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mike susz

@mikesusz

#notevenonce

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mike susz

@mikesusz

Europeans can be snooty about their date format all they want but until they invent a 14th month they don’t have Pi day. America wins!

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mike susz

@mikesusz

it’s Pi day! today, remember to cram your noisy face-hole with pie.

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mike susz

@mikesusz

i played half life 2 for a while tonight so now i totally get what you all loved more than a decade ago.

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mike susz

@mikesusz

everybody have fun tonight.

everybody Wang Chung tonight.

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mike susz

@mikesusz

on the plus side, I’ve arrived at the point where a 1:20 commute feels like glorious triumph.

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mike susz

@mikesusz

that thing where you arrive at work, look back at your car, and think “why did you bring me here? can you take me somewhere else?”

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mike susz

@mikesusz

i’m going to start leaving Doge reviews on Amazon. “Such Quality. Many Value. Very Customer.”

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mike susz

@mikesusz

wow, Newsweek really, really messes with Pocket app. so, i won’t be reading anything in Newsweek.

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mike susz

@mikesusz

Your search -  - did not match any documents.

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mike susz

@mikesusz

google trends for today: journalists searching for how to type 

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mike susz

@mikesusz

i became aware of this building when i was studying architecture in the early 90s. i never got down there to see it. http://curbed.com/archives/2015/03/06/paul-rudolph-orange-county-government-center-demolition.php

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mike susz

@mikesusz

empathy 101: a joke is not a joke when it includes a threat. what is a threat? a suggestion of harm that is specific and actionable.

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mike susz

@mikesusz

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mike susz

@mikesusz

and tonight i played HalfLife2 for a while. i’ve now played games in 2015 for about half as long as i spent at PAX in 2015.

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mike susz

@mikesusz

i hope Apple announces the new “Wall Street” PowerBooks on Monday.

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mike susz

@mikesusz

home from PAX. it was interesting.

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mike susz

@mikesusz

so far, I waited in line for about 3 minutes for a game called “urinal.”

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mike susz

@mikesusz

heading to PAX. costume: old rando guy

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mike susz

@mikesusz

The neighbors probably have a pool on when I’m going to buy a new battery for my truck instead of jump-starting it all winter.

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mike susz

@mikesusz

bankruptcy. 202 items in my Pocket queue.

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mike susz

@mikesusz

good morning! my commute today literally took half the time as some in recent weeks.

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mike susz

@mikesusz

Red Sox pre-season on MLB network.

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